Jon and Kate Minus Lidstrom

I'm doing my fantasy hockey thing again this year. Last year was a big bust for me, partly 'cause Ozzie played so poorly for the first 80 or so games of the season and screwed me on all my goalie stats other than wins, but mostly because I had no idea what I was doing. And when I say no idea I mean, I had about .0000001% of a clue what was going on. And that .00000001% was pure homer - I think I had about 12 wings on my roster.

Last year I thought for sure there was no way I was going to lose the PIM stat, not even one week, I mean really I had Lids and Dats - together those two rack up less penalty minutes in an entire season than the number of free throws Shaq can sink in a single game. Little did I know, the goal in fantasy land is to actually acquire penalty minutes.

So this year I figured I'd do more research, actually try to draft from other teams, check out stats, pick some guys who actually take penalties, blah blah blah. This year I was gonna do good dammit! And the some beyatch drafted Lidstrom before I could get to him - which really makes you look stupid to have a team named "Osgood as Lidstrom" and not have Lids.

Not getting Lids was a disappointment because I had spent a ton of time picking and repicking players and mock drafting the shit out of it so that I was pretty sure I could get who I wanted. It also f'ed up the rest of my draft order and I ended up with some retard players, one of whom doesn't even have a contract. Whatever.

So here's who I thought I wanted and who I actually got:

Round Wanted Got

• 1. Pavel Datsyuk Pavel Datsyuk
• 2. Mike Richards Mike Richards
• 3. Chris Osgood Chris Osgood
• 4. Nicklas Lidstrom Andrei Markov
• 5. Andrei Markov Jamie Langenbrunner
• 6. Jamie Langenbrunner Dennis Wideman
• 7. Dennis Wideman Alex Burrows
• 8. Kris Versteeg Steve Montador
• 9. Alex Burrows Jonas Hiller
• 10. Steve Montador Owen Nolan
  
• 11. Jonas Hiller Michael Ryder
  
• 12. Owen Nolan Jason Arnott
  
• 13. Michael Ryder Ryan Malone
  
• 14. Jason Arnott Ville Leino
  
• 15. Ryan Malone Jonathan Ericsson
  
• 16. Ville Leino Darren Helm
  
• 17. Jonathan Ericsson Jon Quick
  
• 18. Darren Helm Matt Duchene
• 19. Didn't know I got 19 picks Nikolai Zherdev

Markov got put on the IR after the first game. That sucks! Jon Quick is a goaltender and I don't want to carry three goalies. Darren Helm is on long term IR. Matt Duchene sounds like a feminine hygeine product so he's gonna have to go. And for the extra bonus: Zherdev doesn't have a contract.

So I moved Markov to the IR and picked up Willie Mitchell from Edmonton and I dropped Zherdev and added Ian Laperriere even though it disturbs me to have a Flyer on my team, but really what can you do? So I've still gotta figure out if I want to move Helm and I have to figure out who to replace Doucheanay with.

Freakin' Markov. Man that sucks.